Dealing with the Grim Reaper


Real, they were raw, vicious emotions
You were trying to hide and contain
But I could still spy them
Peering, waiting to spill through your tormented eyes
Your afflictions, your struggles, your demons
Smoldering you little by little

Pills everywhere, they were your ammunitions
Mocking you, beckoning you
Pop them in your mouth, yes you did
Forget the pain albeit a fleeting time
A brand new day you always had affirmed
But it was persistent and inescapable
A vicious cycle of despair

His death you never learned to accept
You vividly remember the poignant day you had to let go
Calmness you masqueraded to the people around you
They asked, they pried, yet they never understood
That you were raging, dreadfully turbulent inside, waiting to explode
You stroked his hair, held his hand, and uttered the words “it’s ok”

Yet, you had questioned God
Why it was your filial son
Whom He had snatched away in an instant
When you had done your best to be a loving mother
You blamed yourself for his unwarranted death
And condemned yourself for what he had become

Until that momentous day you decided to rise again
Because you had another son who needed a mother
He was obscured in your eyes the whole time
But he was there patiently waiting, watching you with weeping eyes
Pleading you to spare him a glance like you used to
You ignored him, denied him, shunted him in a corner

He lost a brother, a friend, a mentor
Like you, he was mourning, nursing a bleeding heart
Suffering from the pain brought by the Grim Reaper
Like you, he was desperate for someone to hold his hand
So he could heal the gaping scar
Unlike you however, a feeble body yet a strong-willed mind

In the end, his powerful words awakened your flimsy will
His presence amidst the despondency was a constant reminder
That you have another son who bid defiance to letting you go
That losing a mother and a brother would shatter him twice, a disconsolate double blow
He was yearning for his mother to muster up the courage, the resilience and the will to live
Hence, being a good mother that you are, you selflessly did
And you finally succeeded

Thus, you have my respect!!


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