Brutal 2013 and My Resolution

new year

Welcoming 2014 with food and friends!!

Hi Twenty-Thirteen, I have started christening you as the despicable stranger who deserves to be buried and forgotten these days. Don’t bother asking why, I just feel like doing it since you are a witness of how I plunged myself in the darkness multiple times and showed my dumbest moments to the strangers around me. I still get shivers every time I think about those horrible times I sold myself to the devil but you remained relentlessly mum and unforgiving for no reason. Being your unfortunate victim, you probably understand the reason why I feel indifference towards you now that we are over. Although I’m not the only one drifting away from what we had for the past 365 days, you are doing a good job of slowly extracting yourself away from me as well. This is definitely a blessing for me as that means moving on and climbing my way out of this hell hole you trapped me into since the first day. Having said this, that big chunk of unexplained, senseless excitement which I was scared to acknowledge the first day we met is now slowly fading, and it’s becoming a flicker, almost irredeemable.

I understand that not able to give you what you wanted a few times is a convincing reason to walk away. A normal being would just give up after being rejected once or twice, but you didn’t for some reason. You decided to stick around until you finally gave up, started voicing your mockery while watching me trip over and over again. Sadistic that you were, you watched me with disinterest as I was thrown away in the midst of a perilous journey. Despite being together for a certain period of time, you were neither being considerate nor helpful at all but brutal considering the fun and laughter you promised in the beginning. Those laughter and success you pledged, they were absolutely rubbish. However, I’m still going to miss caring and thinking about you because you had taught me the greatest lesson of life,  the art of letting go. I initially thought that I wouldn’t have the courage and confidence to do it, but as I started welcoming your buddy with open arms, I have realized that I am actually more than ready to let go, memories and all of which I accumulated being with you.

Your buddy has been knocking on my door for the past seven days beckoning me to start a new life with hope and optimism with or without you in it. As I’m done dealing with the turbulent emotions you flooded me with and cleaning up your bullshit, I will concede with whatever your buddy has stored for me. I’m done being confused and having these never-ending whys’ which have been giving me concussions because of the constant banging of my head against the wall for answers. It is obvious that because of your negligence, your ignorance and your selfishness of not giving me concrete answers, I’m waving a white flag to my heart’s content. This time, my resolution is not to be bothered by your vague actions and your stupid, unending riddles. I’m done unraveling your puzzles, deciphering your messages and keeping tabs on questions which seem impossible to answer. I honestly had fun dealing with your bipolar attitude, “2013.” To say the least, I’m just glad you and I are over.

bday 2

Bring it on 2014!!!!

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